Dear Friends,
It is 10 o’clock in the morning on Saturday here in New York, at 8 p.m. in India. I have been in New York for the last three weeks, working very hard, attending to my business and also paying attention to my personal life. As I was thinking about what to write in this blog, I thought of writing about Just wanting to be happy.
We all pass through different phases of life and sometimes feel that we are not happy because of our circumstances, because of the unexpected that sometimes comes upon us. I would like to write on how I feel about this. I woke up quite early in the morning, on Saturday-5.20 am New York time, as I was feeling thirsty. Everyone in the house was sleeping and the time in India was about 2.45 p.m. on Saturday. As I woke up I saw a text message on my cell phone. I read it with dismay; it wasn’t good news for me. In fact, I was expecting a decision to be made in India, with regard to a matter related to my business. I was so sure of receiving good news when I went to bed on Friday night. I had the hope of hearing good news on awakening. On the contrary, the message was negative. I did not get what I wanted. Immediately sorrow began to creep in and I tried to fight it.
I had a glass of water and came back to bed. My initial reaction was to pick up the phone and call my counterparts in India to inquire what went wrong and to find solutions because I was trying to make myself happy. However, good sense prevailed and I realized that for one to be happy, one needs to be calm and patient. Hence I decided to go back to sleep. I woke up three hours later and then started to tackle this particular problem. If I had not taken this step, I would have been an unhappy person in the early hours of the day and that too on a weekend. It would have spoilt my entire weekend, whereas I was able to go back to sleep, wake up and take control of the situation.
We all know that everyone desires to be happy. I just want to be happy is what everyone says all the time. To me, this is like a hole on the floor covered with a rug because, once you say it, the implication is that you are not a happy person. Just saying I want to be happy is not how one should define it. Happiness is something we achieve by being specific and focussed in what we do and having a plan on how to get there. Just staying out of a problem or running away from one is not a solution. I wrote about what happened to me this morning. I have had many incidents in the past that has made me unhappy. However, I knew how to quickly recover from it because I had a plan in place.
I have encountered various problems, felt dejected and even got angry and lost the positive thought process on many occasions. For example, when I try calling a customer, most often I find the call goes to voice mail. I leave them a voice message but never hear back from them. Should I get unhappy with this? Initially, I used to, but not anymore because that is the reality of life and I learned, over a period of time, how to get over it. Try to alleviate some of the uncomfortable and unpleasant emotions that we feel by trying to be positive. It works. I have tried many tricks in life to keep myself happy because I like to be happy, as, I’m sure you would too. I feel we create unhappiness by not defending ourselves from things that come against us in advance because we don’t have a plan in place.
Some times when we get unhappy it becomes a burden on our souls. We get too engrossed with these worries, which only contribute to our unhappiness, which creates a little hole in our souls. This is quite natural. It happens. We are human beings and we are able to live with many holes in our soul, pretending that we are happy. Pleasure, love, compassion, and fulfillment these things do not leak out of our souls. They have to be natural, just like how well you express yourself to someone else that you are happy, putting on a pleasant face, being positive even though you are carrying burdens in your soul (which is a hole as I would call it).
There is no point in spreading unhappiness to others just because are in a situation that you are unhappy about. Unhappiness is natural in life. Everyone that you see in this world is not a happy person. We also, some times, rather most of the time, have to be prepared to face unhappy situations and learn to not project that unhappiness on your face.
Recently on a flight to Bangkok, I was able to get another perspective on what happiness means. This perspective came from none other than my good friend, Mohanlal. It was a late-night flight and we were tired but we still had enough energy to talk about various things. Among these topics, I brought up happiness and asked Lal what it meant to him. Naturally, his perspective seemed to be very artistic in nature, clearly reflecting the kind of person he is. Lal taught me that happiness need not just be an expression of joy or limited to a smile. Happiness is an ocean of various emotions, feelings, thoughts, and experiences. To everyone, it holds a different meaning. What generally might make one person happy could mean sorrow to another, just as everything else in life.
Friends, in the past 35 years, right from the young age of 17, I have encountered lots of unhappy situations. Life is very funny. One can also make it funny. We can convert problems into funny situations and even make them work to our advantage. I have done this, especially this morning. I got very angry when I woke up and saw the text message, but I did not give in. This is how I would like to conclude writing this blog. I was able to resolve the problem that I encountered this morning by trying to stay positive and I made sure that this problem was resolved. My happiness is back with me and I am going out to have a great time in New York City, keeping myself prepared for further bad news that could come, but at the same time being prepared to defend myself and keep myself happy. I want all of you to be happy and cheerful.
Best of luck!